Enough with all this war, famine, pestilence, movie box office stuff. Time for some real news:
Apparently, the local Mickey D's in Toledo, Ohio, was out of McNuggets. When informed of this, a twenty-four-year old woman apparently became so enraged that she punched out the drive-through window. She was treated for her injuries and arrested for vandalism.
Now that is a jones. No McNuggets?! Aaaaiiieee -- ! Taste the Fist of Death!