Monday, November 26, 2012

Rock Bottom Remainders

As I was sitting here a little while ago,  I happened to think about the Rock Bottom Remainders. Those of you with a literary bent will probably recognize the name as that of the rock group put together by a bunch of New York Times Bestselling authors, ala Stephen King, Dave Barry, Amy Tan, Ridley Pearson, et al. They played gigs for charity, did tours, went to Memphis, lot of three-chord rock, like that. Retired now, so they say.

And I thought to myself, why, I need to write a tribute to them (sorta), so I whipped out the guitar, used the two most classic rock chord patterns for the verses and chorus, wrote some words and turned on the video cam.

It flowed, O it flowed so easily. I won't liken it to what you might think it flowed like, but from beginning to end, including the upload to YouTube? Eighty-two minutes.

I have to go to Costco now–we are running low on toilet paper. Just a coincidence, really. 

And apologies to the band, if any of them every catch wind of it ...

Rock Bottom Remainders

G,  D, Em, C

Well, the rich book writers they formed a band to sing
some rock and roll/, triple-chord rhythm and blues 
and little bit of soul/ They all went down to Memphis 
on a tour bus made of money/ and they gave themselves a 
name so ironic and so funny.


G, Em, C, D

Rock bottom remainders/
Rock bottom remainders/
For the books that nobody buys/
Rock bottom remainders/
Rock bottom remainders/
Oh, the rich writers you know they tell you lies.

‘Cause you won't see Stephen King in there, no Dave Barry, no 
Amy Tan/ they got more money than Scrooge McDuck, don't 
need no retirement plan/ but my last novel is just right there, way down on the bottom shelf/ remaindered book all alone all alone all alone all alone all by itself …


They all live in gated mansions/ with servants out the wazoo/ they eat paté from plates of gold, caviar and champagne too/ they got baseball teams and private jets
and TV stations galore/ and every time they write a book, they get a whole shitload more.


That’s what they do ...

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