In light of recent discussions, here and elsewhere, I am going to offer some free advice. (Given the price, one must consider its worth in that light -- might be worth exactly what one pays for it -- but I've never let that stop me before ...)
Leave off already with the snake oil.
People who pay attention to such things tend to hear alarms and see red flags when a claim seems, on the face of it too good to be true. It might be true, but as a basic rule one learns early in writing fiction, truth is no defense. It can be absolutely true, but if it doesn't sound true? It won't play.
If you have a product or service you wish to offer, it is much better in my mind to undersell it than to oversell it.
I know, I know, nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public, and advertisting folks will tell you that hype works, and for some it does.
Not for me. So if you are looking for discerning folks such as myself to try your product or service and you pound me over the head with how miraculously terrific and unbeatable it is, I'm not going to come have a look.
Recently, I wrote and offered some ad copy to a guy I know who has a training seminar. He and his co-teacher are extremely well-qualified, what they offer is great material -- this from folks I know and trust who have told me -- and you will certainly get your money's worth and then some, but the kind of student they really want is apt to turn away once the get a whiff of the cure-all, walk-on-water hype they've come up with to offer it.
Hide your light under a bushel. Hide the bushel. Tell us you think you have something worthwhile and why, but don't deck it out with neon and brass bands, please.
Look at the way you tell us about what you do. If in your description you have the words "best-ever," "revolutionary," "unique," or "unbeatable," then rewrite it. You don't have to be humble, but if something comes across as bullshit, that's going to lose those folks who aren't looking for that addition to their diet ...
1 comment:
Got an email, somebody asking if I was talking about them. And in the interests of truth, justice, and the American Way, here's the ad copy I wrote -- I doubt the folks for whom I did it will use it.
The names have been changed to protect the guilty ...
"People are always offering some miraculous, new-and-improved gimmick to change your life and help you become a better human being. It can be mental, physical, spiritual, financial, artistic or some combination of all of those, and the ad writers for these things usually paint a picture that would put Da Vinci to shame. They offer first class snake oil, have a big swig, it's good for whatever ails you ...
Uh huh. Right.
Let's face it -- if you go to a weekend seminar thinking you are going to come home with the ability to leap tall buildings and take your daily walk on the surface of your neighborhood duck pond, you are in for a big honkin' disappointment. The reality simply isn't the hyperbole, and anybody with the experience and intellect of a fence post ought to know this.
We wouldn't insult your intelligence by such claims.
However, this is not to say that there isn't good material out there, and we believe that what we do, will give you more than your money's worth.
We, in this case, are (Some Guy) and (Some Other Guy.) We could prattle on about our qualifications -- between us we have a fair amount of experience in those mental, physical, spiritual, financial, and artistic disciplines of which we spoke earlier -- but all you have to do is get online and Google our names and you can find that out for yourself. And rather than believe what we say, you should do just that -- check us out.
What we offer with our seminar is not magic. It's not even new, most of it. It is a distillation of a wide swath of disciplines that you could go out and mostly find on your own, but that we have done for you -- plus a few original bits that we came up with to blend it together smoothly. Martial arts, yoga, creative thought, all kinds of stuff that we know about first-hand. What we offer are better ways of moving, thinking, and feeling than most people use. More efficient manners of going forward on your own journey. Methods we believe will teach you to get physically fit, mentally sharper, more creative artistically, even more spiritual, if that is your bent.
Wouldn't it be great to be fitter, calmer, more self-confident? You can be, if you really want, and we can supply you with the tools.
We open a door and show you what's on the other side, based on our experiences, things we believe will truly benefit you. No, you probably won't come away with a soul-rending epiphany after a few hours that will turn you into some kind of superman. Yes, it will require discipline to practice it on your own. Free lunches are in short supply, and real results require real work. But: If you take what we teach you and apply it, use it, practice it, allow it to become a part of your life, then we do say that it will give you a way to stride through life better than most people ever figure out.
We could be wrong, but we don't think so. We are confident that what we offer works, enough that if you honestly try what we show you, if you work at it for six months, if you follow the lessons with real intent, and it doesn't help you enough so that you and your friends or family can see a real difference in the way you look at the world, we'll give you your money back.
It doesn't work, you don't pay for it.
Change, real change, isn't easy. And a lot of people say that's what they want, but they don't, not really. If you do and you are willing to walk the walk and not just talk the talk, come and see what we have.
You won't be sorry."
Post a Comment