Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Sickest Buddhist

Swiped this one from Mushtaq. I'm not a Buddhist, though I have some fun with the tropes. These guys are having way too much fun ...

5 comments:

  1. The lyrics, anyway:

    ‘Sickest Buddhist’ rap by Arj Barker

    lady friend: hey baby where you at?

    Arj: I’m still at the ass-shram.

    lady friend: hows it going?

    Arj: It’s going killer. the instructor just told us to do a 45 min meditation

    lady friend: really?

    Arj: I nailed it in 10!
    lady friend: no way!

    Arj: Owned! (ed. note: Om-ed?)

    I’m the illest Buddhist you’ve seen
    all the ladies wanna meditate with me
    I look so serene when I bust a lotus
    but i don’t have an ego so I wouldn’t even notice

    I think of you before I think of myself
    that’s probably why people think I’m so chill
    But still I’m hell of intense
    my clothes have little bells and they smell like incense

    It’s so dope when I focus on my breath
    cause I floss all the time and I chew big red
    I don’t smoke weed but I burn sage by the pound
    wave it all around til the air turns brown

    I’m all krunked up on kombucha and juice
    never heard of kama sutra? let me introduce
    Step in to my hybrid we head over to my bed
    64 positions I think you’re gonna like it

    [CHORUS]

    one hand clapping fuck that Yo more like the sound of a one-legged standing Ohh!
    I’m blowin up the dharma like what! cause I’m the sickest Buddhist and I’m kickin Buddha butt
    x2

    I just went to the class for a laugh
    maybe meet some chicks
    but as it comes to pass
    I kick ass at this pacifist shit.

    Non-attachment I just mastered it
    You don’t believe me? you don’t think I’m peaceful?
    Step up to my face and say that bitch
    I’ll non-attach your teeth from your lips

    I practice compassion towards friends and enemies
    but all these motherfuckers trying to hate on my serenity

    [GIRLS]

    hes’ so spiritual
    so unmaterial
    almost ethereal
    eats organic cereal
    his aura is so bright
    his chakras are so tight
    his energy is light
    his hair is so right

    he’s so sweet and Buddhist Unh

    Is it my Indian roots
    My Guatemalan pair of shoes
    My extensive collection of expensive Tibetan flutes
    I don’t know how or why I’m so zen
    I make the power of now look like the power of then

    To hell with Dr Phil, Oprah and Martha
    I chill with Eckhart Tolle, Deepak Chopra and Siddhartha
    Buddha taught me to be humble and kind
    But I’m so fuckin present I’m like ahead of my time

    Enlightenment eludes most til they die
    But i opened my third eye on my first try
    Why? I don’t know I guess I’m just the bomb
    When it comes to modesty I got it goin on

    [CHORUS]

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  2. Someone really needs to meet him on the road...

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